FatSatan's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Broken Clocks]

Obviously there is something wrong here.

Because this should clearly be the highest scoring movie of the day. Stunning.

RenegadeClock responds:

Hail Santa! I mean... SATAN! Happy Clock Day!

[Dedicated to my brother]

Sorry. But...

What I'm seeing is a bunch of very small pictures (filesize issue, no doubt) montaged together, probably using some program that lets you put in those transitions fairly easily. I can barely make out the person in the tiny photos, and the whole thing loops once or twice before the song runs through.

I can sympathize for your loss, but if I let that affect my vote it wouldn't be fair. So I voted low on this. But good luck to you and your family anyway.

[DucktaleZ 3]

totally incredible

The length and graphics are amazing, the audio hilarious, the seamless blending of parodies... terrific.

[Megaman2 <The End>]

Well...

Not a bad Flash, but a poor choice of topic, little animation and a lot of traced pictures. The music was nice, but you just picked it for the movie, it's not like you composed it. Basically, while recreating Megaman with Flash drawings is a good idea, the ending sequence is too dull for that. I'd rather see Megaman fighting someone or at least doing something else than walking the same loop while flipping colors.

[NGs' Guide to Reviewing!]

sigh.

I don't understand why the people trying to lecture other NGers are always the same whose movies suffer from very obvious problems. In this case I suppose it's a bit different since your movie's about reviewing, not making Flash, but it still doesn't make you come across as very credible.

Filesize: you imported an uncompressed, full-size MP3 into the movie and set it up as an event sound. This is the single biggest mistake people new to submitting on NG make. It's why so many people's first movies near the 5 MB mark and get subsequently blammed.

Creative effort: practically zero. A small lecture about how you should review, which is all STATED IN NEWGROUNDS RULES AND GUIDELINES, and a short quiz that helps no one. The quiz's buttons are text-based, another common mistake, because you can't click inbetween the letters to proceed. No animation. One background.

Overall: what makes you think you're qualified to be telling people how to review? Furthermore, what makes you think people who don't take the time to read the rules will take the time to watch your text-based movie? People who don't follow the rules eventually get banned from reviewing or whatever they're doing wrong. Movies like this are not necessary, but if you're going to do it, at least do it so there's something good or amusing to watch.

Potski responds:

I pity you. ^^

[The Stairway]

I get it!

Pixelman ascends the stairs and steps in piss, then a young Gene Simmons fills in a psychology test to illustrate how dark a person he really is.

Or, the author's a self-loving windbag who needs to learn how to draw.

Nobody understands you, wah :(

Cyrus-Dragon responds:

Geez, I sure did get a lot of morons to watch this movie. You lack insight and the movie has nothing to do with me.

I don't care to say more than that. Eat shit

[Rise of the MK: Part 4]

Meets and beats the expectations.

A solid story, propelled with almost only visual material (and a few sounds out of Mario), all the little nods to Mario games, all the little details in the back... Ten minutes worth of sprite animation, and all the while I'm hoping it won't end. Yet when it does end, it's one of those great "celebration" endings, that's certainly how a Mario game would handle it. A fantastic conclusion to the series!

[Macarena - Incomplete]

a would-have-been masterpiece :'(

Isn't it funny how a song that's been played so much that it drives you up the walls just to hear it can suddenly sound funny and new again just by speeding it up? Last week someone sent me a speedy version of Banana Phone and I actually found myself replaying it.

I take it you lost the original .fla and was just left with the last published .swf? Damn shame, this flash's style was great and hilarious. I don't even think it needed backgrounds, the white worked out just fine.

[LoZ: OoT Lock Remix]

good idea... but could use a bit more, maybe.

A good idea, to use music from Ocarina of Time (which is stuffed with memorable tunes) to inspire short movies. However, the tunes were so short, most artists didn't get more off the ground than three different shots of a character against a background, and few of them were inspired beyond the point of just showing Link playing his ocarina. Kind of dull.

There's some great remixes and orchestral versions of the longer background tunes from Ocarina of Time being passed around p2p networks, you might put them to use in a more elaborate version of this idea (I'm not saying you should use the full songs, which probably run a few minutes each, but just parts of them). Or a series of movies recreating the most classic moments from Ocarina of Time with Locks, I wouldn't mind seeing that.

sandman0277 responds:

You know the song on the menu? I'm planning on making a collab to that. Yes I know the parts were too short, but oh well.

[To Kill A Clock05 Trailer]

don't really get it

I was watching this and felt it looked so familiar, so I checked out your first "to kill a clock" movie, and the story seemed to be virtually the same. Are you remaking that animation with newer graphics? I can't say I found it very much impressive. It's not nice to say and all, but I think you could do better by now, with all the experience you've gained from making Flash movies. The voices were a bit weird too, SBC and Anticlockclock started out using the same voice, then ACC was using the voice usually used for SBC. Well, this is just a trailer after all, but I hope the final product looks more like a significant improvement over "to kill a clock."

AntiClockClock responds:

Yes, it is a remake with better graphics and a more in-depth story/script. It is going to be a huge improvement and I am combining everything I know about flash to make this.